Songs from: Buick City, 1:00 AM (2018)

Buick City, 1:00 AM is a podcast opera. Through spoken dialogue, sound design, and music, it tells the story of a woman traveling back in time to 1984 to prevent the murder of her father.

These songs are excerpts from Buick City, 1:00 AM:

Katie Eastburn, Alto
Elyse Kakacek, Soprano
Eric McKeever, Baritone

Emily Manzo, Piano
Shawn Lovato, Bass
Aaron Siegel, Drums
Jason Cady, Modular Synthesizer, Pedal Steel Guitar
Jeff Cook, Engineer

Song for Skip
Life is unbearable
death’s inevitable
it begs and beckons
every day, every second
it draws you near
whispers in your ear
“life is illusion
death’s the solution”
because, of course,
the earth loves a fresh corpse

But if you want to defy
the cruelty of life
don’t do its dirty work
embrace your worth
reverse the reality
of the world’s brutality
move toward the light
a better future is in sight
you have so much to give
all you got to do is live

The Future is Bleak
It’s easy to fall when you’re on top
everything ends but decay never stops
you crushed the weak during your winning streak
but the future is bleak, yeah, the future is bleak

You say you’ve heard this despair before
it’s my nightmare not yours
you don’t care about the words I speak
but the future is bleak, yeah, the future is bleak

Today will be okay like yesterday
you can make it, if not, you can escape it
you can sail away but the boat has a leak
because the future is bleak, yeah, the future is bleak

Religion is Conspiracy Theory
What would life be like
if the preachers were right
and from beginning to end
our path was predestined?

What if the world we knew
was only a doorway to
another place, a paradise
of love and eternal life?

You want to know the mystery
but religion is conspiracy theory
a repression of reflection
the same answer for every question

How foolish to have faith
in life beyond the grave
our hold on life is tenuous
every breath is precious

Why say your prayers
when there’s nothing out there?
Talk with the people around you
the here and now is profound too

You want to know the mystery
but religion is conspiracy theory
a repression of reflection
the same answer for every question

The Gnome: His Dreams and Journeys
The Gnome smokes his pipe and feels serene
he lays down and begins to dream
while unbreakable bubbles scream softly
and plastic mushrooms play clairvoyantly
but hazel skies think blindly
until the opaque windows dance motionlessly

The Gnome wakes up and drinks his tea
he goes out and begins his journey
while swift tortoises read tightly
and subterranean clouds shine breathlessly
but transparent mirrors eat jealously
until the shrinking trees float violently

The Gnome and the clouds and the trees
they are all looking at me
Hey! Stop looking at me!

I Met Hope and Defeat Again
I met Hope and Defeat again
I asked ‘em where Luck’s been
Defeat said he never met her
Hope said you’ll do better

But without avail I always fail
I never win, but I try again
it’s just my personality
they call me Tenacity

Since I Left You
When I was a little girl
they told me, “it’s a man’s world”
don’t choose dreams you can’t achieve
but I refused to believe
I knew I could do all I wanted to
had high hopes and declined to hide
it was scary but I still tried
until I married and died a little inside

Since I left you
I’m alone but my life is my own
since I left you
I’ve had troubles but I’ve changed and grown
since I left you
I feel free and young again
since I left you
I see the world’s not just for men
Since I left you
my destiny seems new
since I left you
my dreams are easy to pursue
since I left you
I’m more whole than when I was half a pair
since I left you
I still have demons but at least you’re not there

Atonement
When you were hungry
I didn’t feed you
When you were dirty
I didn’t clean you
When you were sick
I didn’t nurse you
when you were naked
I didn’t dress you
When you were in the rain
I didn’t cover you
When you were in pain
I didn’t love you

But when you fell
I caught you
and when your legs failed
I carried you

I know I can’t undo what I’ve done
I know I’m worse than everyone
I did everything I shouldn’t do
And I deserve your judgement too
now let me make an atonement to you
I’ve got so much to give, if you could just forgive

Secrets and Lies
Today’s our anniversary
I shop for clothes and groceries
I roast chicken, carrots, and peas
I clean the window in the bedroom
my husband drinks and watches the news
I watch the sunset and think about you

pretending in public I don’t know you
compelling the private love I show you
secrets and lies
are the ties that bind us
desperate need
is the greed that guides us

Today’s my birthday
I walk home and get stuck in the rain
I want to talk but have nothing to say
I sweep the floor in the bedroom
my husband snores and drools
I go to sleep and think about you

pretending in public I don’t know you
compelling the private love I show you
secrets and lies
are the ties that bind us
desperate need
is the greed that guides us

Electric Dream
I had an electric dream
I didn’t know it wasn’t real
I did everything I wanted to
without ever hurting you

But when I woke up I saw
the destruction I had caused
a desert broken with despair
brought about because I didn’t care

I wasn’t just having fun
I was helping everyone
spreading love and kindness
blind to my cruel mindlessness

Backed against a wall
I hate to admit it
but now we all
know I did it
Now I’m caught
and the evil I wrought
horrified me
and spoiled inside me